


All his love

by nerdsirius



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Intersex Loki (Marvel), Jotunn Loki (Marvel), Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Loki (Marvel)-centric, Loki raises himself, M/M, My First Fanfic, Odin (Marvel)'s A+ Parenting, Time Travel, Timeline What Timeline
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-31
Updated: 2020-08-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:15:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 2,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24471175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nerdsirius/pseuds/nerdsirius
Summary: Loki falls from the bifrost and ends up on Jotunheimr in the middle of the battle with Asgard. Odin, with his eye intact is battling a mighty Jotun. He cloaks himself and walks through the battlefield towards the temple. The casket glows from the centre, but he doesn't spare it a glance. He walks as if in trance to a cocoon bundle covered with protective charms.Ignoring the bloodshed around him, he picks up the baby and disappears.
Relationships: Loki & Loki (Marvel)
Comments: 35
Kudos: 89





	1. The beginning

"no loki"

_no loki_

Then he falls. 

After everything he did for them, he was never enough. Everything was a lie. His whole existance was a joke. He finally understood that even if he gave his everything to them, they will still spit on his face. He was just a stolen relic. These people who he considered his family, raised him to believe that his own kind were monsters. He always knew he was different from them. But he tried. He tried with everything he had to fit their mold. He remembered the many times he asked moth- frigga,

  
'why am I so different mother? Why am I not like thor?'

  
'why does father not even glance at my accomplishments, but threw a feast to honour Thor for hunting a bear'

  
He never got a reply. All he got were half-truths, empty placations and then he was dismissed. He stopped asking questions. But the questions still remained.

  
'why did Thor get a Mjolnir at his coming of age and he got nothing?'

  
'why did he develop a cunt a few nights before his coming of age? He knew nobody else got one.'

  
'why was he attracted to both sex? He knew he was an ergi. Why was he so different?'

  
Then he found out that he was a Jotunn. His every question was answered. Odin didn't love him because he was a Frost giant, a peace bargaining chip. Frigga dismissed him because he was not her blood. She taught him magic because she was intrigued by his seidr. She was more a teacher than his mother. Blood is always thicker than water. He found out that Jotunn were intersexed. On their coming of age, they developed reproductive organs. He could both bear and sire children. So even his nameday was a lie. Among the horror, it was also a relief to find answers to his most pressing questions. These people were never his. Asgard was never his home. 

He falls

He wished Odin had never found him. He wished he had someone to call his own. He wished someone to care for him. Someone who loved him.

The norns listened.


	2. Message of the Norns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki on Jotunheim

He doesn't know how long he falls. He may have been falling for years or days or even it has been a minute. He feels something watching him and tries to make himself as small as possible. Eerie silence surrounds him. He closed his eyes and submitted himself to his fate. His destiny is to die. Not a single tear will be shed in his name. Maybe a few will remember him and share a laugh at his expense. Their ergi prince. Maybe Thor will remember him. Even if Thor was blind to the injustice he faced and did nothing to stop the bullying from his friends, he was once close to him. When he was young, he used to be his little shadow and follow him everywhere. Maybe Thor will be happy to be rid of him. He feels his clothes tatter and begins to lose consciousness. 

When he gains consciousness, he finds himself laying on a soft ground. He fears to open his eyes. There is a stench of blood in the air. 

  
'Maybe the fall has broken something' he muses

  
But he doesn't feel any pain. His body feels lighter than ever.

  
'Must be the adrenaline'

  
And then he hears it. The distinct sound of clashing swords. The galloping of horses. The laughter of victory and cries of pain. 

  
He opens his eyes in attention. 

  
He is laying on snow and his skin is blue. There is a large rock in front of him. The voices are coming beyond the rock. 

  
'Maybe they are unaware of my presence'

  
He cloaks himself invisible and starts to move towards the voices. 

  
'So I have fallen on Jotunheimr and the Aesir have started a war in my absence' he scoffs

  
He sees General Tyr and many elite einherjar in the battle. 

  
'Thor and his friends may be nearby'

  
And then he sees Laufey.

  
'How did he survive? Was that man an imposter? He looks younger than him. Is he his son?'

  
Laufey(or his son?) was battling a man with a red cape. He could not see his face. He has blonde hair but he is not Thor. He can identify Thor from anywhere. Then he sees it.

  
Gungnir.

  
This is Odin. 

  
Just as he realises this, Laufey (?) gives a battle cry, pins Odin on the ground and vehemently takes out his eye. 

  
And then he sees his face. 

  
This cannot be true. Instantly everything makes sense. He feels dizzy.  
'How is this possible? Why am I here? How can this even happen?'

  
Then he feels a voice in his head.

  
"You are here for a purpose. You are here to change what you desperately craved. Once you take what you desire, you will be back in your time. You have our blessings."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggestions are open!


	3. Chapter 3

_"You are here for a purpose. You are here to change what you desperately craved. Once you take what you desire, you will be back in your time. You have our blessings."_

He moves as in trance. This is his chance to have a family. He ignores the warriors around him, his cloaking spell a protection against Jotuns and Aesir alike. He sees the temple, the Casket of Ancient Winters on a pedestal in the middle. The wrath of the Casket makes it difficult for the Aesir to come near the temple. But he doesn't care about the Casket. 

  
There are many Jotun warriors around the temple. He searches for his seidr around the place. 

  
'Odin found me on the temple. The baby must be nearby. I can feel the faint traces of seidr. Maybe someone cloaked the baby. But Odin told me that i was abandoned in the snow to die. So even that is a lie. I am naive to believe anything that comes out of his mouth, and they call me God of Lies' he scoffs

  
He moves towards the back of the temple and again searches for traces of his magic. And then he feels it, still mild but definately his. 

  
He moves inside the temple, careful to not get noticed by the warriors. He did not want to fight. Just as he slips inside, he is face to face with a Jotun.  
In a second there is a knife in his hand.

  
The Jotun pays him no mind and keeps on vacantly staring. Loki lowers his knife but keeps it ready in his hand. He looks at him carefully. There are frost tracks around his face. He is ethereally beautiful, even if he looks exhausted. Now that he looks carefully, he really does not look well. He is bare from the waist down and is sitting in a puddle of blood. 

  
'Where is the blood coming from? He doesn't look injured even though he is a picture of exhaustion.'

  
He is hugging a bundle of blankets to his chest. The top buttons of his tunic are undone. 

  
'Is he bleeding from the chest? Is he using the blanket to stop the bleeding?'

  
His face looks familiar. He doesn't know why but he feels the urge to help him. He is not very much familiar to healing magic but he knows the basics. He concentrates his seidr towards the Jotun to strengthen his body, but his magic doesn't obey him. He tries again but to no avail. He drops his invisibility and moves towards him. He is still in his Jotun form. 

  
The Jotun leaning towards the wall doesn't even startle, he just makes sound which is either a sign or a pitiful wail. Loki keeps his hands on display and moves towards him in a universal gesture of peace. 

  
"Where are you injured? Please let me help you"

  
The jotun looks at him and then at the blanket hugging his chest. Loki takes the absence of violent response as a permission to move closer to him.

  
"Please I will not hurt you. You are very weak. You need a healer. Is there anyone outside that you need? I can bring someone here if you want"

  
Slowly, very slowly the frost giant lowers the blanket from his chest. He looks carefully at his chest for any sign of inju-

  
Oh

  
He wants to smack his head for his own stupidity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> His magic did not work because future cannot change so much. So spoiler she has to die.  
> Also please I need suggestions!!!


	4. Baby Loki

_Slowly, very slowly the frost giant lowers the blanket from his chest. He looks carefully at his chest for any sign of inju-_

  
_Oh_

  
_He wants to smack his head for his own stupidity._

  
His mother.

  
He had always thought himself to be a unlovable monster. It always felt a ridiculous notion that someone could care for him. In Asgard he was always perceived as a burden. Even Thor, who promised to always be beside him left him for his friends who filled their relationship with vitrol. Maybe it was easy to hate him. 

  
But here was his mother, moments away from death but still nursing him. The baby nestled in a cocoon of blankets looks not even an hour old. Jerking himself to motion he spots a pot of water. He is functioning with pure adrenaline. His body needs rest but now is not the time. He fills a cup of water and brings it the Jotnar.

  
"Drink please" he said softly

  
But the Jotunn doesn't even move. His hands securely around the baby, he looks at Loki as if he could see into soul. When a minute passed, Loki could take it no longer. He brought the cup to his lips.

  
"It's just water please. You need to a healer. There must be one nearby" he insisted. To his relief, the Jotunn complied. 

"I will bring you a healer. Everything is going to be fine" he said moving towards the door. He was stopped by a soft voice.

  
"Take him"

  
Loki turned towards him instantly. His mother was looking at him with a tired but expectant face. His shaking hands holding the baby to him. Loki had came to temple for the baby. But now, he wanted to save his mother too. 

  
"Just wait. I will be back with a healer. Then I will take both of you away from this war"

  
"Take him please. He is not safe here. I will be fine just please take my gem away from this realm" he said desperately

  
"You don't even know me. How can you trust me with your baby?" said Loki

  
The frost giant gave him a tired smile.  
"Call it a mother's intuition. But I know you will take care of him"

  
"But what about you. You are not well. I can't leave you here. You can --"

  
"I knew my fate. We don't get to choose our time. The norns have written my death this day" he said by a smile.  
He put the baby in Loki's arms. The baby was sleeping peacefully.

  
"Take care of him. Don't let the evil touch him" he said with tears leaking from his eyes which turned to frost as they touched his skin. 

  
"I swear it"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yaa I know that the chapters are too short. But this is my first attempt at writing. Don't be angry at me please.  
> Also comment where should Loki raise baby!Loki???


	5. Goodbye Jotunheim

He had to get out of this destitute war torn realm. He didn't know when he will be returned to his own timeline but he does not wish to be on Jotunheim when it happened. He moves fast with the baby in his arms, the baby's head resting on his shoulder. He is tired, hungry and doesn't have a place to go. With exhaustion setting in his bones, he drags himself away from the fighting warriors. Leaving the blood and death around him, he moves towards the forest. Thankfully he finds no warriors there. Finding a cave, he settles himself on the floor still keeping his arms around the baby. 

  
"You are so tiny. I will never let Odin touch you. The horrors of Asgard shall never reach you"

  
Finally hunger overtakes him and he settles the baby on the floor. He carefully tucks him in his blanket and puts a few protective charms on him for good measure masking his scent from animals and a ward to notify him if anything comes in the vicinity of the cave.  
"I will be back darling. Take care"

  
Loki returns in twenty minutes with a deer. He lights a low fire to cook his meal. He again takes the baby in his arms. The little Jotun is awake and he looks at Loki with intense eyes bringing his small blue fist in his mouth. Loki feels his heart overwhelm with happiness just by looking at him.

  
"There is nothing in this world that I won't do for you. Even if this is unconventional, you share my flesh and blood. You are my family. I will raise you as my son. My loyalty will be with you till my last breath. You will write your own destiny. You may never have a throne but you shall be happy. I will teach you everything I know. My darling, I proclaim you Charlemagne, may you be the king of hearts"

  
The newly named Charlemagne makes a gurgling sound, and Loki falls in love all over again.

After eating the whole deer, Loki could feel strength returning to his body. But there was still a dilemma. He didn't know where he should go. He had to find a solution soon as the baby needed to eat too. Vanaheim and Alfheim were ideal choices but they had very close ties with Asgard. He didn't know too much about realms beyond the nine. He didn't want any attention. Midgard is a perfect to blend in. But he had a baby with him. Every child with seidr required healer attention during his first decade. Midgard didn't have healers or seidr. 

  
'This is the second time today I wish I had healing knowledge'

  
With little choice left, he decides to go to Alfheim. A strong glamour of elven features would help them mix in the realm. Now the second dilemma was how to get there. He knew many hidden passages between the nine realms but due to the restrictions around Jotunheim, the only passage he knew were to Asgard. He really didn't want to go to Asgard. 

  
'There are two passages from Jotunheim, one opens in the weapon vault and second fortunately in my bedroom. I hope no one touched my room as going to the vault is suicide' he muses.

  
"Well, no time waste then" he said getting up. "Come on Charles darling, time to leave" 

  
Using the blanket as a carrier, he strapped the baby to his chest. He didn't want to risk attention in Asgard. He applied the cloaking spell to himself and the baby. 

  
"Norns bless us"

  
He found the portal site and teleported to Asgard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So loki and charles will live a decade in Alfheim.  
> What do y'all think??  
> Also anyone interested in being my beta? My writing skills are atrocious.


	6. Not an update

I am not abandoning this fic!!! But I have seriously hit a block. I change my ideas every day and really can't stick to one. But to the dedicated readers, stay with me guys I can do this.

In other news, I am staying with my parents rn. My brother and I have moved back with them due to the pandemic. He and I are somewhat similar to thor and loki. Him being thor and I being loki. So this staycation is killing me. Hope you guys are doing alright.

I love you guys so much.


End file.
